12/20/2010

feeling worse

never expect anything.

I never ask you to do this, do that.
never want too much.
never ask too much
never order too much
never be too sensitive
never be too angry
never be too tricky
never be too dependant
never be too careful.

but I've been too sure

I'm the mrs. brighside. I've been her. But I'll be her no more.
thought I've knew you well. but actually, I just don't. 
I don't want you to be mr. perfect, I never wanted that. you're what you are and nothing I need to ask more. I never aim too high, wanting so much things from you. I like what you are. But why'd you have to do this. do the thing I don't like. one small thing that you did so easily without realizing what could my feeling be when I knew it. 

The more I think about it, the more this heart trembled.
I'm not a typical of person that could easily forget bad memories. I may looked in a state, looked like I could accept it. but deep inside, still I think about it. it's always been like that. forgive, but not forget. and in this case, I couldn't mend my thoughts. so many question that makin me feel worse. why did I'm so sure that you are good behind me? why did you do that? did you care of me? am I too foolish, or it's you that's too smart? am I that careless? it's all still cyclin in my brain. you couldn't force me to trust you a hundred percent.

what you did isn't the main point. the way you disgress my trust is.




lesson's learned
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