2/22/2009

fufufu**

I felt useless. yes useless. Yeah, sometimes in my life, i have this boredom point. the very down point of my life. I've ever felt this before. when I was a sophomore. Many pressure. hhhhhhhhh. now, i need someone to talk all over my thought. i do have a friends.even, they're my friends, they seems like too tired to listen to me. call me egoistic, but i do really need someone to talk to. my friends, they seem had a bigger problem than ME. so i doubt to talked to them. bzzzzzz then, i felt useless. useless for my team. yeah, tomorrow I'll be better! go-go-go I'm tired of this thought, this feeling. and I hate when some people seeing me 'not right'. example, this three person.
  • This boy, is my classmate, he see me like a typical stupid, shallow, gossip girl. Yeah, i know, he is so religious, smart and etc etc. But, he just don't know me AT ALL. I know about my religion, i know how it means to me. Maybe I'm not that strong in my religion, and my knowledge about it is above him. But, he doesn't know, i have this thought about a religion wider than him. he is a nerd about the religion, he doesn't think wide, think big. he just so extreme, narrow minded. i dislike him. i hope he'll has a enlightenment, someday.
  • The second human is my friend. We may close, but not that close. She just saw me like a child, and immature person. I hate the way she saw me. Her expression is : flat, tired, and her text to me is so so so concise. when i saw her text, i deleted it suddenly. because i hate it. I've tried to be good to her. being very nice, always smile at her. but what she has give to me was just a shit. I try to be very patient at her. I confuse, what I've done to her? until she seems like dislike me. I try to be very careful when I gave a deadline to her. All I do to make her still healthy, no tired.
  • The third person is ergh. sometimes she is okay but sometimes she is argh. her face is aaaaaaaaaaa. she is a friend of the second shit I told to you. yeah, the way she looks at me is so same with the second person. I don't like the way she told me. She's a typically a person who act-like-teacher. And I hate that. Iam not stupid. I know what I must to do. and she is so clever at making me so useless thanks!
For you guys. YOU JUST DON'T KNOW ME AT ALL. talk to my shoe!
*yeah, maybe it looks like so negative. but it is jus a thought, an opinion.
blah

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give me hell