ignorable

currently listening to : SID feat Shaggy Dog - Jika Kami Bersama

yeah yeah yeah, basi sih aku baru suka sekarang sama tuh lagu -.- lagunya bagus trnyata haha kalo ngedengerin jadi mbayangin kekompakan gitu. yang bener2 brotherhood sejati gitu deh, kumpul bareng2, berjuang sama sama, seru2an bareng, bebas dan lain lain zzzzzzzz
daaaaaaaan itu sangat menohok ya, in my status quo right now, rasanya pengen banget rewind ke masa masa ak di kepanitiaan umum awal tahun lalu. pengen banget, ak bilang. dulu kayaknya seru, ngefeel banget deh pokoknya asik.
di semester dua ini ak included in suatu program umum yang ak pikir seru banget. I think it'll gonna be the most challenging, exciting , interesting organization. I looked from the people included there, they were seems so cool and fun. We made this great concept, this goood title and tagline and blablabla. I was so happy to be part of it, in case I was ffelt a bit unignorable there. I tried and tried to built my confidencies, to spoke up what is my idea, though I never felt so comfortable there, I tried to be. Because of why? Because I was loving this event so much.
Till I can't be able to keep this boredom, this shit-evil-thoughts to be locked in my own heart anymore. I was freaking out. I felt I'm invisible. In every forum they made. I hate this feeling, this rubbish situation. Maybe I'm too immature and egoistic to face this. Yes I'm over react, just a big load of rubbish that can't do anything. But here, I have this spirit, I have this hope for this things. Hm but yeah I don't even know whether I still have those spirit z. And I do the efforts. I do my job, ladies and gentlemaaaaan. Hey guys, yeah I'm a sophomore, I'm a rookie. I'm nnnot as great as my partner that included in those what is that school org or what. But hey please, I want to be visible in your eyes. I want to speak up an hear what's the newest matter from this event. Yes sir I'm a rookie but I had this big vision spinning in my head. Huh scheiss. Yeah maybe I'm too hyperbolic in here, but heeeey this is just my opinion and this is what I've felt.
Beside this rude cruel smothering matter, I've finally found my own world. Where I can speak up and show my idea. Where there people noticed what I've said. And where I can make my own great team and build our case together. Thanks God for giving me this little oase inside the huge silly dessert z.

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*bad english, haha so what